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The Very Lady Francesca the Discombobulated of Wallop upon Deane
"Wallop upon Deane" has a nice ring to it, as long as it's this Deane.
The Very Lady Francesca is alive and overwhelmed and trying to make the adjustment back to being a working Very Lady Francesca. For the two or three of you that still pop in here occasionally, an update is coming soon, I promise. Meantime, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
UPDATE: Nick's is:
The Right Reverend Nicholas the Deipnosophist of Old Throcking in the Hole
Heh. ("Deipnosophist" means one who is skilled in the art of dinner conversation. And he certainly can be.)
I bought myself one of these as soon as I saw it. For the last 15 years, chestnuts have been a staple in my Thanksgiving and Christmas turkey stuffing, and Nick and I have spent many hours together laboriously cutting X's into each and every one (not to mention peeling them after roasting). Thank God, neither one of us ever cut a finger in the process, but we've come close -- and we've always wound up with very sore thumbs from bracing the nuts against the knife blade. This will be the first year we won't have to do them all by hand.
It's a little sad how excited I am to try this thing out. My life is apparently not sufficiently thrilling -- and I have always had a thing for kitchen gadgets.
My deepest and most heartfelt thanks to all of you who have wondered about where and how I am doing these last two months. Contrary to some speculation, I have not retired to a South Seas Island in blissful splendor. I thought about coming up with a good cover story, but decided that truth is the best defense, so here goes:
The truth is that this situation we are in with our dear Daughter is more heartbreaking and soul consuming than I could have imagined. Don't get me wrong: life remains generally good and I am blessed beyond anything I have a right to expect for myself. But the pain and anguish of watching my Daughter struggle with life-altering issues, with the growth necessary to deal with those issues effectively, and with the resulting fundamental changes in our family life is pretty hard. We have taken out loans to pay for her treatment that are equivalent to several years of college at an Ivy League institution of higher education, and I have had to go back to work as a result. I thank God with all my heart that He has led me to a job made to order -- decent pay, lovely people, a work ethic I can get behind, and a job description that was written just for me. Good pay doesn't hurt.
But psychologically and emotionally, I am doing the equivalent of putting one foot in front of the other. And doing so takes most of my concentration and energy. At the end of the day, I am at the end of my reserves. Nick and I are working mostly at tending to ourselves and our marriage, all of which have taken a greater beating than we were previously prepared to acknowledge. How grateful we are that God has led us to a place where the "treatment" includes giving us permission to NOT beat ourselves up over our failures as parents, but to ackowledge our heartfelt commitment to this child and simultaneously take the space we need to regroup and heal.
So.
My heart hasn't been much into blogging. I have appreciated your e-mails and comments expressing concern, even if I haven't been able to summon the energy to respond. I hope you will forgive me. I will be back. One of these mornings, I'm gonna wake up with the urge to write about something and this is where it will wind up. In the meantime, keep us all in your prayers, and know how deeply appreciative we are of your concern and good wishes.
Oh, and my new job has taken me to Dallas on business, where I offer the following photos as proof that not only am I alive, but that Little A and Mrs. Mayhem are also among the living:
We ate a lot of food:
(Little A was especially happy with his choice.)
Our waiter Tony thought we were a little strange because we wanted to take photos of all the food, but he was a good sport about it:
After dinner -- where, I assure you, we solved the world's problems (too bad you missed it) -- we decided to be extremely bad and indulge in this:
And this:
And this:
But never fear! We incorporated plenty of roughage in the form of edamame (which Little A didn't care for so much):
All of which was worth every single stinking calorie.
Ellyn Burstyn. Nicolas Cage. Beautiful Pacific Northwest scenery. What could go wrong?
A lot, it seems.
What a complete stinker. I mean really: a complete and total stinker. Pee. Yew.
At one point, I actually started giggling and nearly couldn't stop. When three evil wenches wearing animals masks popped up in unison from behind some bushes and then popped down again, I laughed out loud.
Do yourself a favor and miss this film. Really. It just reeks.
Long term, team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.
RESPONSIBILITIES
The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION
None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE None required. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION
Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
BENEFITS
While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered, this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.
Thanks to regular reader Bob for sending this to me recently -- too funny, and too true.
(I have no attribution for this, so if you know who wrote it, let me know.)
Well, we're home and the trip went extremely well -- better than we could have hoped, in fact. Southwest Airlines gets my vote as the best airline running today -- they were unfailingly helpful and accommodating, and arranged for wheelchairs and airport representatives to meet us at every flight. We had help with bags and rental cars and even getting me to and from the rest rooms between flights. Even better, every single person who had a hand in helping us was uniformly cheerful, pleasant and patient. Thanks, Southwest! You rock.
The reunion with Daughter was deeply, deeply moving and very satisfying. The program had arranged for a three day series of events designed to give us an appreciation for what she had been doing for the last nine weeks, and boy were we impressed. She "busted" a fire within minutes of our arrival, using only a bow drill set (if you don't know what this is, this link will give you a good overview, though Daughter's materials were somewhat different) and cooked us dinner over an open fire. She was self-assured and completely at-home in the out-of-doors, and had responsibility for our safety for the next three days, which she took very seriously. She had hand-carved a wooden spoon for me as a birthday present, and I used it for every single meal while we were there -- I am making a shadow box of a number of things from our trip to commemorate it. And we spent two days doing exercises with the other four graduating families intended to give us a look inside our family dynamic and our communication styles. Some uncomfortable stuff there but very enlightening. Most impressive was Daughter's willingness to examine and discuss her own behavior without bowing up or getting attitudinal -- amazing.
I actually managed to spend the first night camping out, in spite of my knees, and the program was good about making some accommodations for me to help me along -- I was permitted to use the porta-potties instead of squatting behind a tree, for instance, and was given a folding chair to sit on for the duration, which really made a difference. Everyone else sat on rocks, stumps or the ground -- doing their best to avoid the small, inconspicuous but very prickly ground cactus that was everywhere. The second night, the pain in my knees was just more than I could handle, so staff members volunteered to drive me to and from the hotel so I could take my heavy-duty pain medication and wouldn't have to sleep on the ground. Daughter and Nick got to have a few hours of father-daughter time, which was terrific, and I was able to join them in time for breakfast the next morning. We saw extraordinary night skies and one unbelievable sunrise -- it was impossible not to feel God's presence very powerfully in a place of such beauty and majesty. (Photos to be posted later.)
After the graduation ceremony, which was full of symbolism and meaning, we took Daughter back to the hotel for her first shower in nine weeks. It lasted an hour, and required the use of nearly every single towel and washcloth in the place! We flew out the next morning to our next destination and spent that afternoon buying her new clothes for school -- she had lost so much weight that the clothes we brought from home didn't fit her! Then, Friday morning we drove five hours to her new school, where she went off with her new group without a backward glance. We had breakfast with her Saturday morning before we left to head home, but I think she would have preferred it if we'd just done without that final good-bye.
Our trip home was uneventful -- we arrived late Saturday, with just enough time to pick up the dogs from the kennel. Sunday we had church and a class, so we mostly spent Sunday evening just recuperating. The emotional toll of the last couple of months, and the emotional intensity of last week, plus all the traveling, really just did us in. Then Monday, a friend of ours who is a missionary from Cambodia arrived for a three week visit -- she'll go on to her home furlough in early October, hopefully rested and relaxed. That's the plan, anyway!
Daughter called us Monday night and she sounded very good -- mischievous and full of her normal good humor. The call was brief -- too brief -- but we'll get to hear from her every week, which is lovely. We had our first phone call with the new school last night, and spoke at some length with her group leader, who says that she is fitting in well and participating as they'd expect: a little cautious, but willing to be encouraged. Sometime in the next week or so, the school will hold a meeting to put together an academic plan and I will drive out to attend that meeting. In the meantime, she's taking standard classes for her age and getting lots of one on one assistance.
And I see the orthopedist today to see if the damage done to my knees will get better on its own. I sure hope so. I'm walking much better than I was a week ago, but I still have problems with stairs and any kind of bending down. I'm off the medication, which is a good thing, and I'm hoping that a couple of weeks of "light duty" will be all that's required to get me back on my feet for good.
Thanks to everyone for the prayers and good wishes -- it's good to be home. There's still a lot to do, and -- frankly -- we are pretty wiped out. I hope things will be back to normal soon!
