There once was a Monkey...

Hello hello helloooo...is there anybody in here?

Fri, 20 Feb 2026 00:52:43 GMT

Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone home?

Just wonderin.....

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Clear can suck it sideways

Wed, 07 Nov 2012 10:54:52 GMT

Looks like our love affair with our Internet provider is over. Its a shame, really. When locals complain about dealing with ATT and Time Warner, we freely sang the praises of Clear. We have two devices: the home modem as well as a portable USB one Jared liked to take with him to work. For $60 it was a decent deal and the service was uber fast and reliable, something their competitors were lacking at the time.

Admittedly, we are Geeks and therefore, we have and always will be heavy Internet users. Last month, we chomped up 86 gig of Internets. How do we do it? We don't have cable TV, so we essentially use the Internet for the bulk of our entertainment. We watch a ton of Netflix, I run Spotify on my laptop while I am working (40+ hours a week)and the occasional time-wasting fun of Guild Wars 2. I don't have LAN parties at my teeny apartment, and neither of us have Halo marathons on the Xbox Live. So while we may indeed be heavy users, I seriously doubt we are that different than ohhh say a family with teenaged children or college students.

Over the years we have been customers, we have steadily watched our connectivity speeds go down, down, down. Jared says on a good day we're lucky to see 3Mbps. We accepted this. We're heavy users, its logical to assume that because of this, we will be squelched during peak times so that we are less of a burden while less frequent users are getting their Farmville time in. We get that, and we accept it. We aren't happy about it, especially when we know for a fact we are connected at way, way lower than their advertised speeds. But we understand this is the price we pay for being Internet piggies.

What we are NOT ok with is when we are being told that not only can we expect our Internets to be slower because our account has been flagged as Heavy Users, we can also expect our service to be randomly turned off as some sort of "punishment" for using the service we faithfully pay for. We found this out yesterday, when at 5pm the Internet was cut off. Jared reset the modem and routers and when he still couldn't connect he called Tech Support to get it back on. He then spent the next 2 1/2 hours talking to 4 different people. Three of them of claimed to be Supervisors, but our combined Call Center experience told us (when we demanded job titles) that the first 2 were really only Team Leads - in other words, lackeys who merely take the escalated calls and who have no real authority whatsoever.

The sum total of the call is that if we get our service turned off too many times, per the Acceptable Use Agreement our account can be terminated. We're too much of a resource hog on their system they gleefully advertise on their website as "expanding". The reasonable question to ask, then, is how can we be responsible customers and prevent this? Their answer: they don't know. They have no way to measure if the time I decide to watch a movie on Netflix is going to be a bad time to do so or not. You can theorize that perhaps if we use our Internets for such things during non-peak hours we can safely do so, but that's not true either. We found that out when our service got cut off at 2am. That was another 2+ hour phone call Jared made where all of this info was revealed to him. Because our account is flagged, we are at risk at any time simply because they have no way to gauge whether or not we are being too much of a drain on their precious system.

With Supervisor #4, Jared gave this analogy:
We are big SUV drivers on the highway we pay to drive on, and they are the toll booth. We speed, we suck gas. In the beginning, we were the only car on the road, so it was no biggie. Over time, however, the road has gotten more packed with other cars of varying size. But we're still truckin' along in our Hummer. Our usage has not changed at all. What has changed is that their Toll Booth cant handle the traffic. They've tried to deal with the problem by adding more lanes (towers) to the road, but its creating a bottle-neck at the Toll Booth and everyone is suffering in the gridlock.

We are now being told that we can't drive our Hummer the same as we have. We have to change our habits, only they can't tell us how or when since they have no way of knowing when its safe for us to drive. Further, we can be totally denied the right to drive altogether in some arbitrary judgement no one can give us parameters on. Other drivers are free to have the unlimited use of the road they are paying for without any threat, without being forced to slow down like we are.

Why are we paying for this? It makes no sense. Unlimited use is unlimited use. Now you are imposing limits on our use, so where's our discount? Supervisor #4 told us we should "pick another road to drive on". Jared's response was "really? Wow...so your 'expanding network' can't handle the traffic, so we should go with another company?" Of course, at that point she started stammering and giving the "oh I didn't mean that" speech.

But that's exactly what they mean. Alrighty then...message received, Clear. Looks like we'll be going back to Time Warner. We'll certainly be able to connect decently at the same price we've been paying Clear all these years. Actually, for the same price we'll be able to get a package that through TW that will give us speeds 10 times faster than what we're currently getting. Wow, watching a whole 30 minute TV show on Netflix without it stalling 5 times will certainly be a refreshing change!

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Stay classy, FaceBook!

Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:17:42 GMT

Late last night I caught this gem from one of my childhood friends:

If you don't eat meat..that's your choice, don't share you bs opinion with my growing daughter! :-P

I didn't respond, but I was sorely tempted to!

Aren't all opinions, depending on your perspective, bullshit? I remember being told years ago "Opinions are like assholes: everybody has one they are usually full of shit."

I am far from a militant vegan. I consider myself an omnivore. I do try to make friends with veggies more these days, but I can't help but be in love with a good steak. And I understand that unless I'm getting my meat from the Amish (and I'm not) that my meat is chock full of hormones and who knows what else. Its an informed decision I make when I eat meat. And while I do find the more preachy vegans to be more than a little irritating, I would never get that nasty towards them.

I get the whole protective parent thing. Really, I do. But I looked at that statement and I can't help but wonder: what's the harm in educating a child about vegetarianism as a dietary option? When did vegetables become "bad" for your "growing daughter"?

And for that matter...when did knowledge itself become bad? I started substituting "eat meat" for other things...

If you're Catholic, that's your choice...but don't share your bs opinion with my growing daughter!
If you vote, that's your choice...but don't share your bs opinion with my growing daughter!
If you believe in the laws of physics, that's your choice...but don't share your bs opinion with my growing daughter!

I guess it all boils down to how the information is presented to a child. There's no sense in telling a 6 year old that eating hormone-laden meat will send them to an early grave (even though there's plenty of statistical data to support that). There's no need to use fear tactics to scare anyone into a change in lifestyle. But I truly don't see the harm in explaining to a kid the benefits of eating more veggies and less McDonald's Happy Meals.

What's wrong with letting your child see more than one perspective on an issue and letting them decide for themselves where they stand? Isn't it the goal of a parent to raise kids to think for themselves?

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Temple Services: Not For Everyone!

Tue, 13 Sep 2011 00:43:17 GMT

Over the years, I've lost track of the number of times I've joked about providing "Temple Services" to my lovers. Late last week, I learned that such things really do happen.

Phoenix Goddess Temple was raided after a 6 month police investigation. Something like 30 people were charged with prostitution. Not surprisingly, the people who run PGT have loudly proclaimed their religious rights are being trampled upon. Also not surprisingly, the Pagan community has been very split in its opinions.

Team #1 says: Prostitution should be legal, man! Sex is sacred, man! If these people are saying they are offering sacred sex, that's good enough for me!

Team #2 says: They are hookers trying to hide behind a religion. And they are about as Pagan as Billy Graham.

I've definitely gone to Team #2.

Their website is predictably vague. But if you see some of their online ads, I don't see how it can be viewed as anything other than a high priced hooker.

Here's the issue I have:

Let's give these people the benefit of the doubt and say they are doing deeply personal, therapeutic work to help people on a psychological and spiritual level. Before their profiles got taken down (due to the legal problems) I can tell you that NOT ONE of their staff had any kind of credentialing or licensing as a therapist, sex therapist or even a sex surrogate. Not one. A few have Reiki credentials, but the last time I checked, Reiki doesn't involve a happy ending. A few have massage therapist licenses, but again...no massage therapist I know would be willing to put their license on the line by performing anything that could be remotely viewed as a sex act. In fact, the LMT's I know have zero tolerance policies and have been known to kick clients out in the middle of sessions when they have gotten too frisky.

And yet here they are, publicly promoting themselves. That's stupid if you ask me. If you are going to put yourself out there in a very public way doing some kind of business that could be easily questioned by the general population (and the law) you better damn well make sure you have some kind of documentation to legitimize yourself and avoid the embarassing perp walk.

I like to think I am a good friend. I'm a good listener. I've been known to give damn good advice to people and have helped people I care about through some really shitty times. Does that make me qualified to open shop and call myself a therapist? HELL NO. I haven't got the degree or the state license to be able to claim that. So if I were stupid enough to advertise myself as a therapist, I'd have no one but myself to blame when the local law comes a'callin' to rein my ass in.

Does owning all the ER episodes ever made make you qualified to be a doctor? No. Watching every Law & Order episode doesn't make you a lawyer. Because again, you don't have the education and licenses required by the law.

This debate should not be about whether prostitution should be legal. I happen to think that it should be made legal, heavily regulated and taxed appropriately. And if people feel that strongly about legalized prostitution, then go on out and lobby to change the laws. But for now, the laws state you can't exchange payment for sex acts, no matter how therapeutic or religious you think that act may be.

Playing the religion card? It just doesn't work. Not here. Yes, yes, there's plenty of Gods and Goddesses out there who are quite sexual. And yes, there's probably plenty of Pagans out there who incorporate sacred sex (and lots of it) in their traditions. There's nothing wrong with that at all and I don't think the law would have an issue with members of a church getting frisky with each other in the privacy of their own spaces. But when you step outside and invite the general population in to partake of your services, request a payment, and you call it some form of therapy, you better damn well cover your ass.

Pun intended.

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Wheee! A Friendzy!

Tue, 05 Oct 2010 02:02:56 GMT

There is a "Subscription meme" going on HERE

I like calling it a Friendzy. It just sounds more festive, dont you agree?

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This is why I need Happy Pills

Wed, 15 Sep 2010 02:56:01 GMT

Part of my job as Cat Herder at the hospital involves compiling some statistics for my boss so she can answer to the higher ups about why it takes so bloody long to get patients on our floor. Moving patients is a big, big deal to the hospital because we have a lot of factors working against us. Since I work in Rehab, we are getting patients who have progressed beyond the more acute care units. Which frees up a much-needed bed for some poor soul waiting in the ER. The Administration pushes really, really hard to get patients onto our floor within 2 hours of notification. Which NEVER happens. For the longest time, we got the blame for it. My boss and I got tired of getting yelled at about it, so I started getting REALLY anal and started tracking the details. Not only do I document when I get notification of an admission, but I track who I give the bed information to and I document any delays that hold up the transfer to our unit. At the end of each month, I compile all my stats and merrily email them to my boss and the Gods on High who pass judgment on us.

And lo and behold, a pattern has emerged! One where we are NOT the bad bad children the Admins painted us to be. According to my data, more than half of the patients we receive are held up because the doctors discharging from the other units do not know how to write the orders to transfer the patients.

Think about that for a second.

Yes. A fucking DOCTOR has not learned how to write orders. I've been bitching about this for months now. On a nearly daily basis I have to field not one, but multiple calls for each patient because the orders have been screwed up. And according to MY bosses, I cannot allow the admission to proceed unless the orders are 100% correct. This is because we are Medicare certified and if we do not follow Medicare guidelines we lose a HUGE chunk of funding. When Medicare says jump, you fucking jump.

So, my boss had this big hoitey toitey meeting this morning and at lunchtime I asked her how my data went over. She said it was eye-opening to the Admins and Doctors from the other floors we deal with. And apparently, the consensus among the Doctors was... *cue whine* Putting the correct orders in the system is tooooooo haaarrrrrrrd! waaahhhhhhh!

Now the Gods on High want my boss (which, by extension means ME) to find a way to dumb down the process.

Think about THAT for a second.

O.o

I swear that is what is wrong with our society. Everything has to be dumbed down. We cant have newspapers above a 4th grade reading level because OMG big words are toooooo haaaaarrrrrrd! And now apparently we have to dumb down an already simple process because Doctors who have had 8+ years of higher education cannot figure out how to put an order in the system - even when I - the non-clinical, non-licensed personnel TELLS them exactly what to do.

Gives you a lot of confidence in the person who is supposed to keep you alive, dont it?

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Allow me this moment of vanity...

Tue, 14 Sep 2010 14:10:56 GMT

Holeeeeeeyyy crap! My hair is actually long enough now that I can wear a single braid that is of decent length without a crapload of stray short hairs poking out of the braid!

And....if I tilt my head back, the ends of my hair now touch my waist.

~squeeeeee~

I know Rhoni is living for the moment when I ask for a major cut, but right now I am reveling in how long my hair is getting! Stay away from me, Scissors!

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Last night's True Blood Finale

Tue, 14 Sep 2010 01:50:16 GMT

So, I started downloading the episode off the Intertubes before I went to bed last night so Jared and I could watch it this morning. Mind you, I have not read any of the books. There's a part of me that wants to, but from what all my more informed TB friends tell me if I read the books I'll just get pissed at how much the show deviates from the books.

( cut for spoilerific details... )

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Synchronicity

Mon, 13 Sep 2010 03:18:02 GMT

Cookies are baked and packaged to take to work tomorrow, hooray! Of course, I had to taste test a few. Oh, the cruelties one must endure!

Rhoni came by for some counsel. She was pretty upset but once it got talked out she seemed more resolute. She's in the midst of some change in her life and its scary and exciting all at the same time. In the last week or so, things shifted into focus for her and she was back to being the old Rhoni I love. Some shit cropped up today in her professional life that kinda threatened to take the wind out of her sails and slow her momentum and she was struggling with the decision to let it go. I'm proud that once she got past the emotional part of it she saw it for what it was and she felt much more confident about walking away from something that was no longer healthy for her.

I'm always struck by these moments of synchronicity. My coven sister and best friend is sitting here in tears as she tells me about how she feels about this situation and the things she is saying are almost identical to the things I said last night to Jared as I debated leaving LJ behind.

In the end, we've both chosen to leave situations that were no longer good for us. And like I told Rhoni, when you clear out something that's no longer good for you, it only creates space in your life to be filled with GOOD things. Things that contribute to your growth and your soul's evolution.

What's funny is that right before she called me on the phone I was sitting here having the internal debate about leaving LJ for the zillionth time today. Was I being too rash? Too judgemental? Was I making a mountain out of a molehill? And then here comes my coven Dedicant asking for advice about a situation that had the same questions. We both sat here and confirmed what we already knew in our deepest heart: that this is the right decision.

I love moments like this when you feel the Goddess move within you in the most mundane of things. We're all students and teachers to each other. At least that's how I think it ought to be.

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Proof my biological clock has shut down

Sun, 12 Sep 2010 21:23:02 GMT

Jared and I had to make a trip to the bowels of Hell, aka Walmart. My department at work is sponsoring a Bake Sale tomorrow for United Way so I had to get some baking supplies.

When we got to the baking supply aisle, there was a mother with 2 children. One was a little ginger-haired toddler girl who was quiet as a mouse, sucking on her pacifier. Her sibling was a tow-headed boy of about 6 who was whining incessantly because he didnt like the cake his mother was going to make for his birthday. "waaaaaaahhhhhhhh I dont wanna soccer ball cake anymore!! waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!! I hate youuuuu!"

Bless her heart, the mother managed to keep from throttling the child. She kept calmly asking him what he DID want but he refused to answer. She'd ask him like 10 times and then finally say "Ok well I guess we stick with the soccer ball like you told me you wanted this morning..." and then he'd start back up with his screaming.

Our timing was such that we were almost always in the same aisle as this woman and her brat. Jared and I both agreed that we'd have dragged that kid straight home with NO cake.

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Sunday thoughts

Sun, 12 Sep 2010 14:39:16 GMT

I thought long and hard overnight about my move to DW. When I told Jared last night about the creepy staff stalking incident along with the staff trolling going on he was astounded.

Before we went to bed, I changed my browser's home page to DW. That was...HUGE for me as LJ has been my default home page for YEARS now.

I'm a little sad that some of my beloved LJ friends wont be migrating. I understand not everyone is going to care or have the issue I have with all of this. And truthfully, since the bulk of my posting is under an F-lock, I am minimally affected by the whole LiveTwitFace issue. But the stalking? The harassment? Deleting comments? That's just not something I am willing to endorse with my hard-earned dollars and the site traffic my blog draws in. And while I am well-aware that my little blog pales in comparison to the traffic the more "famous" LJ'ers bring, I still feel that my defection will add to the growing numbers of other loyal users who have left for safer harbor.

Dreamwidth is far from perfect. They are still relatively young and are right now a small pond. And that's ok. I remember when LJ was a small pond and right now I feel like I've been foolishly holding on to that fond memory in the hopes that the Russian Mafia at SUP would return LJ to those glory days. They wont. They simply dont care. And that's fine...it is a business after all and they are free to run it or mismanage it however they want to.

Doesnt mean I have to stay there and be a party to that. And I wont.

Guess I'll be hosting and/or participating in a few Friending Frenzies! But at least here in DW I wont be stalked/harassed by the staff.

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