I want to be its meaning

At essentially the last moment, I decided to attend the virtual WisCon which was run via discord, youtube, and jitsi. The discord overall had a connected-via-internet feeling that I still sometimes get from parts of twitter but I missed from when I was on LJ/DW, and there was a channel for dreamwidth fans. I was really only able to fully attend Sunday and Monday, because I was working Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, but by the end I did feel like I’d figured out this particular discord server, mainly by focusing on just a few channels. And I had a great time! But the server was always meant to be ephemeral, and it shut to posting at the end of the convention.

There was a dreamwidth channel, and a number of networking/find-me-elsewhere posts included DW names. I decided to dust off this journal. Maybe buy a rename token?

Tuesday, I con dropped. No big deal! I can find the friending meme later!

For the rest of the week, I was exhausted. Work is currently exhausting. No big deal! I’ve got Sunday and Monday off – it’s not procrastinating, it’s planning ahead!

And then ( current events in the US )

So yeah. Hi, friends who have been here! I have sometimes read your posts! I will do some back-reading this week.

Hi, friends who are new! I used to write fanfiction. I fell out of the writing habit when my brain chemistry changed, about a decade ago (details are in posts tagged 'all in my head,' but I think they're mostly locked). I do still read a ton of Avengers fic, though I’m terrible about not actually interacting with anyone else in the fandom. I also read published fantasy and science fiction, romance, and some ~literary~ fiction, along with popular history and science books. I post tiny reviews to Litsy pretty regularly, remember to update LibraryThing in big chunks about monthly, and may have been convinced to start using GoodReads for the community, even though that’s feeding the A-empire’s algorithms. My username at all of those is tied to my wallet name, and I do still maintain something of a wall between my fan name and my wallet name, so I'd be happy to share it in a message or a locked post - but I want this to be unlocked.

I grew up in the Midwest; I moved to the South five years ago, close to my cousins from my mom's side. My parents are aging and have had health problems that made me worry for them before All This, but my little sister lives relatively close to home if need be. I'm bi/queer and way more out about it at the edges of a Southern city than I was in a Midwestern town. I'm also some shade of demi, though I'm still figuring out how I feel about the fit of those labels.

I work for an indie bookstore that continued operating throughout the shutdown as a webstore, which means I was employed at a harder version of my job with more stress, more pressure to keep the place running for those who stayed home to have a job to come back to, and less of every part I enjoy. So I don’t fit neatly into any of the stories we’ll hopefully live to tell about this year (not unemployed, not work from home, but also… not essential). I’m trying to remember how to be a writer, and as often is the case when I’m on this site, I’m trying to figure out what I’d like to do with my life next – I was burning out before this spring; I’m just burning brighter now. And I may actually change the name of this journal; just not today.