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Tankmen (Web Animation)
Well, something had to happen with the guy in the Newgrounds logo.

In the year of 20XX, the world has been destroyed, all nations obliterated. All that survives are random factions of warriors that fight for... well, who the hell knows. They are the TANKMEN.

As described in the quote above, the Tankmen series is a group of online animations on Newgrounds made by animator JohnnyUtah (NewgroundsImage), featuring the famous mascot of Newgrounds himself, Sergeant John "Tankman" Captain, and his partner Steve, getting into funny antics in the middle of war in a post-apocalyptic world.

The list of canonical episodes are "Tankmen 1", "Tankmen 1.5", "Tankmen 2", and "Tankmen 0.5", which can all be watched here.Image (Due to copyrighted material in "Tankmen 1", the first episode of Tankmen cannot be watched on Newgrounds.)

On top of many user-made spin-offs, parodies, and other creations based on the Tankmen, Sergeant John Captain has made some notable appearances in other games, most notably as a fighter in Newgrounds Rumble, an assist character in Fraymakers, and an opponent and planned-to-be playable character in Friday Night Funkin'.


Tankmen provides examples of:

  • Affectionate Parody: One fan flash, "TANKMAN3" by Gonzo, called out the series for its use of referential humor and a perceived over abuse of gay jokes and dick jokes. Evidently, JohnnyUtah didn't think that user went far enough, and created "Tankman Three!!!" as a parody of that flash and an even bigger oversimplification of his own work.
  • After the End: As mentioned in the description at the top of the page, every nation and its government has been dismantled for unspecified reasons, whether it be mutual destruction or an unknown disaster.
  • Apocalypse Anarchy: A prominent theme of the setting that Tankmen takes place in. The main characters are remnants of military groups that seem to be fighting each other for the sake of it, with no grand end-goal in mind for any of them for what we know, and often the characters don't take situations as seriously as one would expect in a war within a post-apocalyptic setting.
  • Artistic License – Military: Though this is intentional, due to Tankmen being a comedy, there are a few things the Tankmen do that the military would not allow in real life:
    • When the characters are not fighting a war, they’re mostly just goofing around. In real life, the soldiers would expected to train or clean the base.
    • In Tankmen 2, Captain and Ted were both drinking alcohol in uniform, which is strictly forbidden in the military in real life.
    • Tim is very touchy towards Commander. In real life, he would not be allowed to do that.
    • All the soldiers and personnel are referred to by their first names. In real life, the military addresses them by their last names, unless they outrank the speaker, in which case they are addressed by their title, such as Sergeant or Colonel.
      • Ironically, for some unknown reason, Captain is exempt from this rule; despite holding the rank of Sergeant, he is the only character referred to by his last name.
  • Awkward Father-Son Bonding Activity: The main plot of "Tankmen 1.5", featuring Private Skittles and his dad talking to him on the phone for a chat, while Skittles is on sniper duty.
  • Bandaged Face: Bill had this before masking it with the signature helmet.
  • Big, Stupid Doodoo-Head: Done by Steve in "Tankmen 0.5" in response to a man standing in the way of his tank, also known as Bill. Compared to his previous threats to run over the guy with his tank, the insult manages to actually get a strong reaction from Bill.
    Steve: You're ugly!
    Steve: And nobody likes you!
    John: Oh no...
    Bill: *sniffs* I... I ju- *whimpers* my family's dead and I- *continues whimpering*
  • The Big Race: According the official synopsis for Tankmen 3, this is the entire premise for the episode. After facing off with two enemy soldiers, Captain and Steve start bickering and argue over “friendly vs. friends”. While they’re bickering, they’re actually racing against the two enemy soldiers they had a standoff with. The 4 are racing to be the first to bring a coveted super weapon, a heavily armed battleship back to their base. The episode will end with Captain and Steve getting to the ship before the two enemies do, winning the race.
  • Black Comedy: With how the bleak the setting is and how seriously the characters don't take their conflict at times, logically this would be present. The most notable one being Bill being killed just right after he says that he's going to be a father. And then in "Tankmen 2", another of the Tankmen laments Bill's death only to get a knife in their back as soon as he mentions that Bill was going to be a father.
  • Bottom of the Barrel Joke: The series may be about soldiers in a post-apocalyptic war, but it wouldn't be Tankmen without some joke mentioning the human male sexual organ! In the parody "Tankmen 5.5", the gag was well-known enough to be summarized as the Tankmen repeating nothing but "Cock Joke".
    John: Oh my! I'm getting a major hard-on! That must mean the enemy's near!
  • Bumbling Dad: Implied with Private Skittles' father, who calls his son in the middle of his work during "Tankmen 1.5" to give him The Talk and to bond with his son, though given Skittles' attitude during the call, Skittles doesn't appreciate it.
  • Chekhov's Gun: In "Tankmen 1", Steve and Tim have a CD of the first and second half of Titanic, respectively. When both Tankman and Steve encounter their enemies on the battlefield, the two sides realize they have both halves together, and decide to stop fighting just to watch the whole movie.
    • Ironically, this moment in Tankmen 1 actually foreshadows the series finale of Tankmen as according to the official synopsis, Tankmen 3, the aforementioned series finale ends with Captain and Steve parodying The Titanic to steer a battleship back to their base.
  • Chromosome Casting: No Tankgirls or Tankwomen here. Girls do exist somewhere around there, given that Bill eventually got a wife while with the Tankmen, but we never see them outside of the Titanic video. Jeff even confirmed that women can be enlisted in Tankmen but they were never shown.
    • Steve’s attitude and opinions towards women in the Tankmen 1 bonus sceneImage heavily indicates there are women enlisted in the Tankmen army, especially in combat positions. The fact Steve has such strong opinions to the point where he believes they deserve death indicates he has been around enough women to form these opinions.
  • Cold Sniper: Private Skittles of the unnamed enemy faction that the Tankmen are fighting against. It's implied that he's one since he was known to be poor in close combat.
  • Cool Helmet: Every soldier in the series wears one, with the Tankmen having their iconic helmets and the enemy faction having Pickelhaube-styled helmets. Only Bill and Skittles are shown not wearing one in "Tankmen 0.5" before putting one on from their respective factions after being recruited by the end.
  • "Could Have Avoided This!" Plot: The main plot of the first episode would've never happened if Steve urinated inside the tank (using a bottle or WAG bag) despite not wanting to, he'd rather go outdoors. This leads to him losing the tank which he gets called out on.
    Steve: Look I uh, I drove out here on patrol and uh, I had to take a wicked piss.
    Captain: I knew it! You lost her didn't you.
    Steve:
    ' Well I wasn't going to piss in the tank! I just temporarily forgot where I left her.
  • Crapsack World: It's stated that all nations in the world are pretty much destroyed, and all that's left are rogue armies that are just shooting at each other for no specific reason. And don't even think about saying that you or someone else is going to be a dad out in the open, or you're a dead Tankman walking. According to Steve, even using the bathroom has its own risks, the lack of bathrooms on the Tankmen base already forces soldiers to do their business outdoors. However, they run the risk of getting shot in the privates by enemy snipers just for doing their business alone.
  • Cringe Comedy: "Tankmen 1.5" is all about the awkwardness of Skittles' father enthusiastically talking about the birds and the bees with him. The father's earnestness and Skittles' repeated attempts to end the call only add to the atmosphere.
  • Deliberately Monochrome: The Tankmen themselves, on top of all the other characters, though the background itself is orange, much like the Newgrounds logo itself.
  • Disappeared Dad: The fate of the unfortunate to-be-born child of Bill, due to Private Skittles invoking the trope by killing off Bill with a headshot.
  • Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Steve tends to do so, saying "Aw, cabbage patch kids!" when he realizes that he can't find the tank he was supposed to bring to battle, as an example.
  • Grey-and-Gray Morality: The Tankmen and the enemy faction that they're fighting against hardly seem to be morally different, actively going into battle and shooting at each other, having casual conversations about it in the process. That said, both sides are capable of being nice when circumstances call for it, including the ending of "Tankmen 1" where both sides decide to just watch Titanic together not soon after encountering each other in battle.
    • The war in the series itself is not that violent and brutal. It’s more casual.
    • The enemy faction also seems to be more morally sound than the Tankmen because while Steve has no problem killing people who annoy him (like the thugsmen in Tankmen 2) and Captain is a jerk to his comrades and subordinates. Commander actually is shown to be caring and compassionate, as shown in Tankmen 2.5 as it was stated in the synopsis that he actually felt remorse for Skittles in his injured state and gave him a bouquet of flowers in the infirmary. One of the enemy soldiers literally has the same mannerisms as a wise monk and never says any swear words.
  • Excrement Statement: The official artwork titled “Graveyard Shift”Image drawn by JohnnyUtah himself features Steve not only vandalizing a Castle Crashers statue but urinating on it as well.
  • Heterosexual Life-Partners: Tankman and Steve, given that they always appear together and they have an overall friendly and casual relationship. (Which is saying something given the gritty though comedic setting.)
  • His Name Really Is "Barkeep": "Tankmen 0.5" reveals that Skittles' name is really is "Skittles". Tim mishears because he thinks he's referring to his candy bag, but the young man immediately clarifies that that's his god given name.
  • Homoerotic Subtext: Discussed in "Tankmen 0.5", in which Tim and Bad Captain ask Skittles if he thinks Top Gun has homoerotic overtones. Skittles' reply of "duh" convinces them that he's observant enough to join their ranks.
  • Lured into a Trap: Averted, when Tim and Bad Captain discover Steve's tank abandoned, Tim is excited to get in it and Bad Captain suspects that the tank is there to set up for an ambush, when the tank really has been left all alone. His suspicion may have been true in a more serious war story.
    • This was going to be the main driving force of Tankmen 2.5 as Ted uses an accidental walkie call to get revenge on Skittles.
  • Lonely Piano Piece: Played for Laughs when the trope is used after Steve makes a childish insult towards Bill in "Tankmen 0.5", saddening Bill significantly.
  • Nature Tinkling: Due to the lack of access to proper bathrooms on the Tankmen base, soldiers are forced to urinate and defecate outdoors. As shown with Steve in Tankmen 1.5 and other Tankmen in official artwork. The bathroom situation for the enemy Tankmen is unknown but it can be assumed it’s the same as the Tankmen.
    • Steve’s throwaway line also heavily indicates all soldiers have to do this. However, they have to be on guard when urinating or defecating outdoors because an enemy sniper could shoot their privates.
    Steve: Look it's stressful out here man! My family's dead and somebody could shoot me in the dick! (voice breaks) And I just wanna piss without getting shot in the dick.
  • Not Helping Your Case: Everything Tim says in the canon shorts is either some kind of sexual pun or a homoerotic joke. "Tankmen 0.5" has him try to convince Skittles that showering with dudes is only as gay as long as you make the encounter, before he jumps in to say that dropping a towel means that he's "available".
  • Pelvic Thrust: Done by Captain while using the tank in the ending of "Tankmen 2", with movement of the tank cannon in tandem.
  • Potty Emergency: Sets up the plot of the first Tankmen. If it weren't for Steve needing to go urinate outside in the middle of his excursion, then the tank wouldn't have fallen into the hands of the enemy faction.
  • Public Domain Soundtrack: "Tankmen 0.5" uses a remix of "Toreador"note  for its background music.
  • Screw the War, We're Partying: The ending of "Tankmen 1", when the two opposing sides realize they each have a DVD for each half of Titanic, and decide to have a truce just to watch the movie together.
  • Series Mascot: Tankman and the tank he drives in, for not only the series but for Newgrounds as a whole. In fact, the series was made since JohnnyUtah was asked to make something centered around the Character in the Logo.
  • Shout-Out:
    • In "Tankmen 0.5", Captain makes passing jokes that Bill looks like Darkman due to his bandaged body.
    • Bill also spends the majority of the short standing in front of Captain and Steve's tank and wants them to stop their senseless war. His semi-formal outfit combined with his attitude clearly evokes the image of the Tienanmen Square protests' "Tank Man".
    • Tankmen 3 was going to end with Captain and Steve parodying The Titanic while steering the battleship back to their base, ending the series prior.
  • Smoking Is Not Cool: Invoked. The pickelhaube Tankmen explain that Skittles can fuel his "disgusting habit" of smoking by joing their military. Skittles himself is pretty neutral on this trope, as while he's seen casually smoking the entire video he's mostly a flippant teenager.
  • Sore Loser: The Thugmen in "Tankmen 2", repeatedly losing to Steve in some unknown game involving a folded-up piece of paper and asking Steve for a rematch right after.
  • Stating the Simple Solution: Done by Steve in "Tankmen 0.5" concerning running a man in their way over with their tank. Tankman responds to not do so since he claims he wouldn't handle the guy screaming in agony if Steve did.
  • Tank Goodness: The Tankmen really do like their tanks! After all, said tank is a prominent part of the Newgrounds logo!
  • Uncertain Doom: Private Skittles' watchtower gets rammed by two vehicles, and the roof collapses on Skittles, and while we don't see what happens to Skittles, the damage to the watchtower makes it seem likely it would cause the tower to collapse, and a fall from that height would kill someone like Skittles if it did, though whether that happens or if Skittles somehow survives is unknown.
    • However, the official Tankmen 2.5 synopsis reveals Skittles did survive this, he was just left a mild concussion (he was able to speak to Ted coherently on his walkie after accidentally calling him). However, as an act of revenge, Ted shoots Skittles through his infirmary room window and he survives this too, he is just anemic and comatose due to blood loss.
  • Unspecified Apocalypse: It is stated that the world was destroyed and all nations fell apart, but no formal elaboration is provided regarding the cause. However, Jeff Imageconfirmed that the unreleased Tankmen 0 was intended to show the cause of the apocalypse; however, other tweets from Jeff indicate that this is not entirely the case, as the episode takes place in an alternate universe. In said tweet, Jeff stated that Tankmen 0 would have been identical to Tankmen 1, except the characters were scientists who lost a laser instead of a tank, inadvertently leading to the apocalypse.
  • Vulgar Humor: The series is prominent for this, being well known for its "cock jokes" and other forms of innuendos used as casual humor, to the point of it being the sole factor of a few parodies of it. Could Jeff be indicating that the true cause of the Tankmen apocalypse was a multiversal phenomenon?
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: Bill, unnamed at the time, appears in the first Tankmen only to get killed not a moment too soon after his debut, and we only know his name in the sequel. He then appears in the prequel "Tankmen 0.5".
  • Whole Episode Flashback: "Tankmen 0.5" focuses on both sides of Tankmen trying to either recruit two young men or threatening to kill them. The casual looking teenager turns out to be Skittles, while the one who wants the wars to end is actually Bill.


    Fan/Noncanon Content 
These are tropes for fan Tankmen content only. (Note: Only add officially endorsed content)

Tankmen Infinity

Tankmen Infinity is a fanmade Tankmen short created by Pikanjo and released on April 30, 2008 (as part of Newgrounds' Pico Day holiday).


  • Action Girl: Tankgirl was finally introduced in "Tankmen: Infinity" and she's no slouch as a soldier. Although she isn't exactly excempt from making mistakes.
  • All Men Are Perverts: Not even counting the Bottom of the Barrel Jokes, "Tankmen: Infinity" has a lot of the male soldiers be distracted or focus on Tankgirl's breasts.
  • Canon Discontinuity: JohnnyUtah has stated that he doesn't consider Infinity canon as he had nothing do to with it.
  • Groin Attack: What befalls poor Steve in "Tankmen: Infinity". Via a knife to the dick from a dead enemy soldier, accidentally caused by Tankgirl; Captain pulling out the knife didn't help things out. Even before that, however, his torturers threaten him with such with several tools.
  • There Is No Kill Like Overkill: For the Tankmen, it's not enough to kill their enemies, they have to do this in an over-the-top manner. When Tankgirl kills a opponent by simply breaking their neck, Ted calls her out for having "no imagination", then proceeds to slice another enemies' torso, get him on his knees, shove his gun on his butthole and demands him to "scream to me, bitch", before finally pulling the trigger. Keep in mind, Tankmen Infinity is noncanon so, it’s unknown how the Tankmen actually handle their enemies.
    • Similarly, Private Skittles, once finding Bill's corpse again, proceeds to snipe the poor guy post-mortem multiple times just for fun.
  • Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!: Steve would've been saved without any issues by the end of "Tankmen: Infinity". Until Tankgirl kills one of his torturers that was holding a knife, which causes their body to drop dangerously close to Steve's body and stab him on the dick post-mortem.
  • The Smurfette Principle: By "Tankmen: Infinity" we finally get one female soldier in the series and she's also an Action Girl who's a part of the Tankmen faction. That said, she's also prone to making mistakes, as in accidentally causing a dead enemy soldier to drop their knife on a captive Steve's dick at the climax.
  • Situational Sexuality: Suggested multiple times with Tim. Although he is pretty much the source of all gay jokes in the series, even he's not immune to the allure of Tankwoman's boobs...if some fan flashes are to go by.

Skittles Meets Phil

Skittles Meets Phil is a fanmade Tankmen short made by Temorinki and released Jun 12, 2022 for that year's Pico Day on Newgrounds.


Other Media

This is noncanon but officially endorsed Newgrounds media where the Tankmen play a role but significant enough to warrant a whole section.

Friday Night Funkin'

  • Extreme Omnivore: During the Week 7 "Erect" mixes, Ted is shown in the background drinking a dark liquid. However, PhantomArcadeImage later revealed in a Twitch stream that the liquid is urine. Which is ironic, given that Ted canonically didn’t really like the taste of piss (considering he had drank his own in a Noodle Incident) but he seems to be actively enjoying it here.
  • Low Culture, High Tech: In one of the concept artworks for Week 7, a Tankman can be seen making a phone call on a smartphone in the background. While this seems out of place, it is excusable within the canon of Friday Night Funkin', as the Tankmen were originally associated with 2000s-era technology, given their series was created in 2006 and is set near the end of the 20th century. Thus, the inclusion of modern technology makes a little sense.
  • Sleep Deprivation: The concept art and promo art for Week 7 frequently featured a severely sleep-deprived Tankman. It’s evident by the fact he’s constantly shown drinking coffee in the artworks he appears in.

 
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